I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
