Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
