Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
