i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
And then my night got REAL pukey
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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