i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
