I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
