I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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