their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize