ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Randomize