i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
