He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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