Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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