i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
