Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize