break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
