: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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