woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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