If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Randomize
