when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
