Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
