school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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