I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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