She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I wish i was in the wii world.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
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