My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
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