I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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