Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
