Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
