the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
