There is no way he is gay with that hair.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Randomize
