3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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