Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
