some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize