Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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