I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
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