i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
