do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
