He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
