Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize
