Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
