I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
