How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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