you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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