Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Randomize
