are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
