I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
