whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
