it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
