i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I just want nice things and good sex
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
