Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
