Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize