Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
